“What nobody tells people who are beginners and I really wish someone had told this to me is that all of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, and it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase. They quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know it’s normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.” – Ira Glass

Listen: Bobby Womack – Please Forgive My Heart
(from the album The Bravest Man In The Universe)

It’s about that time to pick up my pen again.. and start writing.. and creating. I may never fit in with typical on-time music bloggers but am somehow perfectly content because what I share is based only when I’m moved by something. However, I really have missed sharing music while getting overwhelmed in the bubble of this so-called life. My little side project or hobby as my family likes to call it, of having the jewelry line *Couture by Lolita* has now rushed me into my big real-time dreams, and my heart is beginning to finally open up all the opportunities that I’ve always wanted to maintain as apart of my secret. In the last year, I overworked myself to the point of severe exhaustion, but believe my own business has lead to doing the most fulfilling work that I ever have.

Although I do love designing jewelry & accessories, my dreams will forever love the beauty and power of music — and that’s how it will remain. Sounds and lyrics effect my day to day, and are what I plan to always base my entire world on.  The way colors of notes, and wavelengths border patterns of beats to visual images are something that will continue to be embedded in my mind. Writing about the passion behind a musician’s biography, interviewing a genius who provides an extended amount of vulnerability and intensity, and standing underneath the lime lights of an electrifying live show are all things that challenge and lead to the success of why I even bother to express how these details inspire my sun-drenched, gypsy soul.

In the last few months, I’ve gathered music is art ideas under my sleeves and have been educating myself to strive harder not to only be a good woman, but to utilize my strengths into helping others who deserve the time and effort. This past January, I turned the adult age of 30 and celebrated my birthday as if I was gifted with the notion of finally understanding who I am. There are no more excuses, and there are no more past mistakes anymore. To my family, friends, strangers, people I may never know, and most importantly to myself, I promise that I will continue to be better in everything that I do, share, and am as a person this year. Even if it’s the simplest and smallest degree of change, deep down I know it will be worth all that I can give. It’s time! More soon…

~*~

Art: Eric Fortune

Listen: Gotye – Somebody That I Used to Know

(Making Mirrors, 2011)

I have come curiously close to the end, down
Beneath my self-indulgent pitiful hole,
Defeated, I concede and
Move closer
I may find comfort here
I may find peace within the emptiness
How pitiful

It’s calling me…

And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping
The moon tells me a secret – my confidant
As full and bright as I am
This light is not my own and
A million light reflections pass over me

Its source is bright and endless
She resuscitates the hopeless
Without her, we are lifeless satellites drifting

And as I pull my head out I am without one doubt
Don’t wanna be down here feeding my narcissism.
I must crucify the ego before it’s far too late
I pray the light lifts me out
Before I pine away

So crucify the ego, before it’s far too late
To leave behind this place so negative and blind and cynical,
And you will come to find that we are all one mind
Capable of all that’s imagined and all conceivable.

Just let the light touch you
And let the words spill through
And let them pass right through
Bringing out our hope and reason …
before we pine away.

~*~

Reflection

Music by Tool

Words by Maynard James Keenan

Artwork: Tool, and Alex Grey

♥♥♥♥♥♥

Image :: Nicoletta Ceccoli

Listen :: Cut Copy – Far Away [In Ghost Colours, 2008}

For years, depression has been seen as something imaginary by the world.  Some believe if they are sad, that it’s easy to get over. Most don’t understand that pain is real.  Only those that are strong enough to admit that depression is something that they have struggled through, realize that it takes a lot more than trying to forget what you’re feeling.

It’s a honest discussion to be a part of.  There’s many levels of trial and tribulations.   It can take years to discover why you feel the way you do.  It can take decades of therapy to discover how to better yourself.  The tears, mood swings and anger all become a part of baby steps. Those that challenge their own sincerity, find similarities in their own desires of why they choose toxic friends, lovers, family members. Understanding why one thinks they deserve them becomes the hardest part. Depression is a life altering force that either completely takes over to destroy or makes a heart become so strong that no one can even come close to touch. As the objection lands, the only way to get through is to believe that life does get better, that there are good people out there,  and many exciting brand new adventures waiting behind the door…

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listen: bjork :: headphones [post, 1995]

genius to fall asleep to your tape last night
sounds go through the muscles
these abstract wordless movements
they start off cells that haven’t
been touched before
these cells are virgins

my headphones
they saved my life
your tape
it lulled me to sleep
nothing will be the same
i’m fast asleep

i like this resonance
it elevates me
i don’t recognize myself
this is very interesting

kisses are a better fate
than wisdom.
~e.e. cummings

Videotape (Mojib Remix) by Radiohead

Happy People (Chill Mix) by Static Revenger

Planet Of Breaks (Jazzanova Mix) by Visit Venus

Just Breathe (SirAric Gravity Remix) by Telepopmusik

The Gravy Train (NOW Remix) by Ian Brown

Minutes (Original Mix) by Habersham

Utopia (New Ears Mix) by Goldfrapp

images redco & you’re beautiful

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cupcakes by ♥ dashed

listen: kid cudi (ft ratatat & mgmt) – pursuit of happiness

eight years ago, a part of our country died.   the very essence of new york, the greatest city in the world was intended to be taken away from us.  i remember that day so well too, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky, it was so beautifully clear and blue.

after watching the 9-11 memorial this morning, it feels like being apart of such an emotional funeral.  the way the faint sound of the cello plays ever so gently behind each remembered lost life offers, such a delicate background to everything and everyone who surrounds.

it seems to always rain now on this day each year and those that are standing under umbrellas, have a look of such sadness that still sits upon thousands of faces all over the world.  it’s nice to see new york city fall so silent and humble in remembrance today.  how each attendee wears a white satin ribbon in honor of someone they lost, while their hands are holding on so tightly to brightly colored roses that are brought down deep inside of the world trade center and placed in a fountain of water to rest, then form a pattern of lines that shape each loved one’s memory.

then watching the new york police department carry the world trade center’s original american flag that is so tattered and torn, but still amazingly all in one single piece.  it seems so powerful to see how strong that flag is and makes one realize how much it has really taken to restore this beautiful gotham city.

there’s not one day where most don’t think about 9-11.

there’s not one morning where most don’t wake up and feel it.

or hurricane katrina…

even virginia tech,

it’s all still raw.

these tragedies have been wake up calls.  the days when it’s possible to actually forget about being selfish, and understand the sorrow of someone else.  its that warm feeling that makes it truly believable in how important it is to be kind to people, and follows within a realization of how great our country can be when we are united and care about each other as one.

~*~

artwork by eduardo recife

listen saeglopur by sigur ros [takk, 2005]

IMAGES: Luphia

The Gossip’s guitarist Brace Paine described this to Spin magazine as “basically like Donna Summer singing a Bauhaus song.”

♥ LISTEN ♥ Heavy Cross by Gossip

[From the album MUSIC FOR MEN, 2009]